Purpose and Affirmation

Yesterday during lunch, God and I had a little discussion. It consisted of me being frustrated with the purpose of life. Not just life in general, but my life. Through some of the things I've been reading lately, I'm seeing the world in terms of people groups, not individual people. This made me angry with God (or more specifically, angry at my lack of understanding) that he has created the world in a way where large groups of people matter, but individuals don't so much. Repeatedly, I thought of the people we never hear about - 13 year old Israelite girls who wandered in the wilderness for 40 years, 11 year old girls in the middle of the Congo who are caring for all of their family during a war, etc. The people that God allows to be tortured and suffer, along with their families. For what?

Then back to me - where do I fit in this world? What is my part besides living every day, attempting to pay off my school debt, and being kind to the people around me? Is there really any point to it all? Combine these thoughts with my own insecurities, and I was feeling just plain lost and frustrated.

Last night I went to my final CASA training. The last few weeks have been glorious as I've gone through this training. As time-consuming as it was, each class just filled me with joy as I saw that this is what brings me joy and fills my soul with passion. So at the last class a few things happened. There was a poem. Written in spanish, translated into English. As the only Spanish speaker in the room, I read it out loud, and was greatly encouraged when one of the CASA employeers pulled me aside and expressed that I speak beautiful spanish. Where did I learn it? This is going to be so good and helpful.
Fast forward 30 minutes to a group activity.

We were practing parts of a investigating a case. The group was to select a spokesperson to deliver the rest of the information. When we sat down to get started, the first thing someone said was "before we even get started I think Kyla needs to be our spokesperson, so let's just get that out of the way now". Okay, this might seem small, but felt significant. The last few weeks I've been slowly gaining confidence in my abilities, and only a few minutes before the group had eloquently given my thoughts about the quote "Work for justice, act with mercy". I have been affirmed over and over through this class that this is the field I was created to work in.
Sense of purpose? Affirmation and love from God?
I think He deserves some credit on this one. Father, thank you for loving me enough to give me affirmation and encouragement exactly when I need and ask for it.

Libertion Theology

Currently reading...
Here's an excerpt from the introduction, page 14.

"Third world Christians think that people like us read the Bible from the vantage point of our privilege and comfort and screen out those parts that threaten us. They tell us that the basic viewpoint of the biblical writers is that of victims, those who have been cruelly used by society, the poor and oppressed. They further tell us that they are the contemporary counterparts of those biblical victims, cruelly used by contemporary society, the poor and oppressed. Consequently, when they hear the Bible offering hope and liberation to the oppressed of the ancient world, they hear hope and liberation being offered to them as the oppressed of the contemporary world. If God sided with the oppressed back then, they believe God continues to side with the oppressed here and now.

Is that what the Bible is really all about? Enough third world Christians are saying so, and living changed lives as a result, to impel us to explore the matter and see whether there might be a new word for us as well. We will do this by taking ten familiar biblical episodes and trying to see them through new eyes. The passages have been chosen both because they are important to third world Christians and because they are familiar to us. The texts give us a common meeting ground to compare different interpretations. As we see how others read the Bible, we may get a new understanding of what the biblical message says to us."
Unexpected News: Reading the Bible with Third World Eyes, Robert McAfee Brown

Our Great Savior

I love reading hymns and digging deeper into their meanings. This one sunk deep into my heart yesterday as I was in the midst of dealing with my own inadequacies.

Our Great Savior
J. Wilbur Chapman

Jesus! what a Friend for sinners!
Jesus! Lover of my soul;
Friends may fail me, foes assail me,
He, my Savior, makes me whole.

Hallelujah! what a Savior!
Hallelujah! what a Friend!
Saving, helping, keeping, loving,
He is with me to the end.

Jesus! what a Strength in weakness!
Let me hide myself in Him.
Tempted, tried, and sometimes failing,
He, my Strength, my victory wins.

Jesus! what a Help in sorrow!
While the billows over me roll,
Even when my heart is breaking,
He, my Comfort, helps my soul.

Jesus! what a Guide and Keeper!
While the tempest still is high,
Storms about me, night overtakes me,
He, my Pilot, hears my cry.

Jesus! I do now receive Him,
More than all in Him I find.
He hath granted me forgiveness,
I am His, and He is mine.

Hallelujah! what a Savior!
Hallelujah! what a Friend!
Saving, helping, keeping, loving,
He is with me to the end.